What God Gave man, Let women now have!-Angela

As females we do not have the necessary equipment to pee standing up. But as the technologically advanced society that we are, this is changing. Women now have access to the freshette, and the she pee. Another technique that Christine Hawes has perfected is peeing in a jar, while sitting in a sea kayak, on rough seas, in a drysuit (yes, she is a female). What enables her to do this with such ease is her perfect balance, placememnt of the jar, and a front zip on her drysuit and long underwear. It is a marvel to behold as she can pee in her kayak, in under a minuet, with no spills.

I have come to adopt this technique under duress (7 1/2 hours is the longest we have been in our boats without touching land). My technique is slightly different as I do not have a front pee zip, only a butt zip. So, I must lye on the back deck of my kayak to unzip my butt zip and pull down my pants. This is a most precarious position at best. Then I must squat in my kayak, position the jar underneath me and pee. This is not as precarious, but is still not fully controlled. I them must lye back on the back deck of my kayak to pull up my pants and do up my butt zip.

Generally I attempt this in calm waters with the help of my paddling companion. But on one particular day, I had other plans. Feeling confident in my balancing abilities, I began the process of peeing in the jar. I successfully unzipped, peed, and began to do up my zipper. Before I was a 1/4 done zipping, a swell caught me off balance and sploosh, cold water came rushing to greet me, all of me. All of me, in my drysuit, which was still open. As soon as my legs came out of my now upside down boat, I quickly finished zipping my butt zip. But too late, the damage was done and the legs of my drysuit were filled with water up to my waist. I began gasping the seisure like gasps of one suddenly and quickly thrown into cold water unexpectedly. I righted my kayak and began to attempt to get back in. But no matter how hard I tried, the water that filled the legs of my drysuit wouldn't allow me to get back in.

My paddling partner, now aware of the situation, paddled over and assisted me as I got back into my boat. I pumped out the water, emptied my drysuit legs of water (with the balancing aid of Christine) and we continued on our way.

Despite the fact that I laugh every time I recall the story, my ego is still bruised. So I have decided to use christines help EVERY time I have to Pee in a jar, in a dry suit, in a kayak, on the Pacific Ocean.